The broadsheets have largely ignored this afternoon’s west London derby, but Isabelle Barker has a superb scoop courtesy of former Fulham favourite Ross McCormack.

The Scottish striker, who scored 42 goals in a century of appearances for the Whites, got off the mark for his new club in the League Cup at Brentford. He was so delighted to break his goalscoring duck having gone four games without a goal after an £11m move from Leeds that he booted the Griffin Park advertising hoardings in front of the travelling fans.

McCormack, who the Fulham fans gleefully told their hosts ‘cost more than your ground’, was petrified to tell disciplinarian manager Felix Magath that he had badly injured his foot – having already been dropped by the German for a perceived lack of fitness:

“I injured my foot when I kicked the board because I was so happy scoring in that West London derby. Mitrovic, just don’t do what I did if you score the winner!

I was too scared to tell the manager Felix Magath after. I didn’t even go and see the physio. I was just scared of Felix and I didn’t want any confrontation. So winning over our rivals, even though it was the League Cup, got the fans on our side and gave the manager more time. I remember I just felt so much relief.”

You can’t blame Ross. Perhaps he was worried he’d have to place cheese on his foot, like this afternoon’s Forever Fulham recipient Brede Hangeland.