Wow. We’ve really made an impression.

Reproduced in full below for the thrill of it:

Another football season comes to an end this weekend with Manchester United supreme and a desperate fight taking place to avoid the drop: if Alan Shearer keeps Newcastle up, his achievement will be greeted by Geordies with as much joy as half of Manchester has experienced.

But let us briefly celebrate an even more remarkable achievement: that of Roy Hodgson, the modest, wise old owl from Croydon, in taking Fulham from the narrowest possible relegation escape last season – on goal difference, by a goal scored 10 minutes from the end of the last match – to the brink of European Competition. If Fulham win or draw their last game against Everton on Sunday, they finish seventh in the table and will be on their travels.

To the delight of supporters, Fulham’s exuberant defender John Pantsil has taken to doing a lap of honour at Craven Cottage after each home game, blowing kisses to the crowd. Come Sunday, there’ll be no more appropriate celebration.